Achtung, babies...

The first time I ever saw Bono, swaying around in a vest with no shirt, long hair pulled back into a ponytail, I thought to myself, “this man is a sissy-boy.”

I don’t think I was really paying attention to the music that accompanied the “With or Without You” video, and that’s one big reason it took me another four years before “Achtung Baby” made me an official U2 convert. “Achtung Baby” was more my style, favoring dark distortion and intense colors more than the black and white earthy acoustic-electric feel of “Joshua Tree”. Plus it had “One”, a song that would have ripped my heart out even if the video had been full of a whole choir full of sissy-boys with ponytails.

Of course, I eventually embraced “Joshua Tree” too, and “Rattle and Hum”, and I loved the stripped-down electric aggression of “War.” Luckily I got on the boat well before “Zooropa” came along and threw us all for a loop, but even that one had its moments.

No, “Achtung Baby” was where it started for me, and that’s why when I heard people saying that the new U2 album was the best one since those days in the early 90’s, I paid attention. I even downloaded the whole thing off iTunes instead of a couple of tracks, because I figured that with a band like U2, you’re better off listening to the whole album in order than picking around looking for singles. Besides, if there’s one thing I don’t like about iTunes, it’s that sometimes the dude/dudette in charge of picking out the 30-second preview falls asleep at the wheel. I shudder to think how many great songs are out there that I’ve missed, just because someone decided to sample the first thirty seconds of the song when nothing has even happened.

But I digress…

So I listened to all of “No Line on the Horizon”, and I have to say it’s pretty good. But it’s no “Achtung Baby”. Maybe a step up from the last one, but definitely not better than “All That You Can’t Leave Behind”, though I am a little biased about that album because it contains the song Joey Ramone listened to over and over while he was dying of cancer.

But even if “No Line on the Horizon” doesn’t push “Thriller” on the all-time chart lists, it won’t hurt U2’s reputation one bit. I am continually fascinated by this band. When the Stones had been playing as long as U2 is now, they were getting wheelchair jokes all the time. Not the case with U2 (though it does help to have a drummer who still looks like he’s eighteen years old). Not only that, but the albums and singles U2 puts out today aren’t picked up by nostalgic fans who quickly set them aside and go back to “Joshua Tree”. As my buddy James said, “U2 is still relevant.”

I’d actually go one step further. I’ve never considered U2 to be my #1 band. I don’t know that I’m even capable of doing that these days. But I will say this: if I had to name one band, one sound that defined my generation, the way Elvis did for his and the Beatles did for theirs, there is no question in my mind that U2 would be that band. Even though I didn’t start listening to them until I was in my early teens, U2 has been putting out music since I was a wee lad, and no other band has been as omnipresent or “relevant.” You can say what you want about Bono’s politics or the quality of the new album or whether I could pass for The Edge and convince the people at Happy Sumo to give me a booth instead of a table, but U2 is the band of my generation. Van Halen had too many lineup changes. Metallica has too narrow an audience. Michael Jackson was abducted by aliens in 1985. But aside from their mid-90’s hiccup, U2 has pretty much stayed the course.

Not bad for a bunch of sissy-boys.